By Jake
This has been a terrible week for movies. First, Miramax announced a slew of unwarranted sequels (including one for Shakespeare in Love). Then the director of the Pink Panther films, Blake Edwards, dies. Now, we have a sequel to Tron and a CGI movie version of Yogi the Bear opening in the cinemas.
Yogi the Bear
I will not bother doing a fake summary for this abomination. It just makes me too mad that it even got made. Plus, it is coming out so close to Christmas, which could mean that it makes a slew of money. Children do not watch Yogi the Bear cartoons. I have three baby sisters (the oldest is 3 years old), and they watch Disney, Cartoon Network and Nick. So, the success of this film is hinged upon people our age taking their children to see it. Now, I do not have a lot of hope for our generation and I would not be surprised if we caused all human life on this planet to be extinguished within our lifetimes, but I still do not see them taking their kids to see this travesty.
This movie is in 3D, so if you wanted to be immersed in fart jokes then this is the movie for you. I would suggest eating some blackbeans and renting the Rocky and Bullwinkle movie. Actually, I would not suggest that. Please do not do that.
Should you go see this?: No, obviously.
Tron: Legacy
A meaningless sequel to a pretty boring movie with good special effects. Like all movies, this is in 3D. Does 3D enhance a movie like marijuana, or is it just a way to squeeze a few extra dollars out of the audience?
I will not be surprised if this makes some money, but I will probably be somewhat confused. The budget of this movie was $200 million. Think about all of the lap dances you could get with that money! Hell, you could probably even afford to finally go to the champagne room.
Should you go see this?: No, but you probably will anyway.
Hey, the restored, extended version of Metropolis was released recently and you can stream it on Netflix. I suggest watching that over either of these movies. If you have kids, watch Metropolis Babies.
In other movie news, I had to send "It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World" back to Netflix without watching it after having it for two weeks.
This has been a terrible week for movies. First, Miramax announced a slew of unwarranted sequels (including one for Shakespeare in Love). Then the director of the Pink Panther films, Blake Edwards, dies. Now, we have a sequel to Tron and a CGI movie version of Yogi the Bear opening in the cinemas.
Yogi the Bear
I will not bother doing a fake summary for this abomination. It just makes me too mad that it even got made. Plus, it is coming out so close to Christmas, which could mean that it makes a slew of money. Children do not watch Yogi the Bear cartoons. I have three baby sisters (the oldest is 3 years old), and they watch Disney, Cartoon Network and Nick. So, the success of this film is hinged upon people our age taking their children to see it. Now, I do not have a lot of hope for our generation and I would not be surprised if we caused all human life on this planet to be extinguished within our lifetimes, but I still do not see them taking their kids to see this travesty.
This movie is in 3D, so if you wanted to be immersed in fart jokes then this is the movie for you. I would suggest eating some blackbeans and renting the Rocky and Bullwinkle movie. Actually, I would not suggest that. Please do not do that.
Should you go see this?: No, obviously.
Tron: Legacy
A meaningless sequel to a pretty boring movie with good special effects. Like all movies, this is in 3D. Does 3D enhance a movie like marijuana, or is it just a way to squeeze a few extra dollars out of the audience?
I will not be surprised if this makes some money, but I will probably be somewhat confused. The budget of this movie was $200 million. Think about all of the lap dances you could get with that money! Hell, you could probably even afford to finally go to the champagne room.
Should you go see this?: No, but you probably will anyway.
Hey, the restored, extended version of Metropolis was released recently and you can stream it on Netflix. I suggest watching that over either of these movies. If you have kids, watch Metropolis Babies.
In other movie news, I had to send "It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World" back to Netflix without watching it after having it for two weeks.