The Last Exorcism (Rated PG-13 for disturbing sexual violence and terror... that might not be the right order).
My Synopsis: Reverend Cotton Marcus has been rockin' the exorcism scene since '83. He meets these poor souls, kindly asks the demons to get the hell oughta dodge, and continues to the next town a few thousand dollars richer. Now, he's prepared himself for the documentary that will end his money-hungry career choice, but he's too stupid to realize that when you shoot a documentary in Louisiana, awful things are bound to happen. When you do anything in Louisiana awful things will happen. Rev. Marcus' charge, Nell, is no different. The exorcism beings; badness ensues.
My Take: I am absolutely not a fan of "horror," because I live horror everyday IRL, and the movies are where you go to escape RL. The only exorcist-related movie I've ever seen is The Exorcism of Emily Rose, and that's because I was kidnapped by Evangelicals who held me in a dark room for days forcing me to watch this movie until I signed up for their prayer list. Since then I've steered clear of this sort of thing, but my roommate, and part-time girlfriend, is a huge horror fan. Therefore, I will be sitting through this movie on Sunday, after several pitchers of sangria, while darting my eyes around the theatre to keep an eye out for fanatical Christians with holy water-soaked throwing stars. Yeah, they're out there.
Takers (Rated PG-13 out of moral obligation).
My Synopsis: Idris Elba, Paul Walker, T.I., Chris Brown, Hayden Christensen and Michael Ealy play an elitist group of criminals (You didn't read that wrong, I said Hayden Christensen is ACTING in a movie, wherein he portrays an elitist criminal. Begin confused-face look...here). These criminals have been pulling off a series of perfect bank robberies, leaving behind no useful evidence for the detective-on-the-job, Jack Welles (Matt Dillon) to track them down. The gang decides to shoot for their biggest robbery which will yield them their largest payoff sum yet. But they better be careful, because Jack Welles is on their ass and Hayden Christensen is as skilled at acting as Gary Busey is at being sane.
My Take...on Takers: I'm halfway tempted to see this movie just because the array of characters they've brought together to form this super-intelligent gang of theives is laughable. If I can sucker someone in to taking me on a date and letting me get REALLY high first, I will watch it twice. I will watch it twice and promote it. Please email me if you'd like to take me up on this offer.
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That's it for this week. There are two other movies coming out, one being Avatar: The Extended Cut, which I didn't feel the need to review considering it's bound to be Avatar, but longer. Also, I made my feelings perfectly clear about this movie a few days ago. The other movie is Flipped, which I reviewed when it was a limited release movie. You can read about it here.
Have a safe and exciting movie going weekend! Unless you're going to Avatar. Please don't kill yourself.
So this supposed to be part of the Exorcist franchise? Katy you should watch the original Exorcist. It's very good and better than the in production remake with Dakota Fanning.
ReplyDeleteAlso, I don't as a rule like heist movies.
hayden christensen is still alive?? who knew!
ReplyDelete