Life With Mikey [3-22-10]

By Mikey 

I'm not going to pretend that I know anything about the health care bill that passed yesterday. I do know one things: I don't want to pay for abortions. I would much pay for a Crave Case from White Castle and everybody knows that I barely like White Castle.



Popeye's Chicken is better than Popeye's Spinach.

Obama is a smooth customer.

Arsonists are cowards.

Jennifer Aniston should have her own talk show.

Nobody gives a damn about Boggle anymore. It's all Nintendo Wii this DS that.

Paula Cole's b-sides are really good.

I have no idea who Justin Bieber is, but I hear his name 30 times a day.

Whatever happened to Micro Machines? Maybe they lost business after Home Alone showed how dangerous they can be.

Applejacks are worse than nothing.

Nobody says "God bless you" when you sneeze anymore. People are probably just atheists now.

My wife makes jokes about eating liver and onions, but I doubt she would even know how to cook it. I'd try it, I guess. It couldn't be any worse than spaghetti squash.

I'm glad pirates aren't popular anymore.

Picnics are fun, but not worth the trouble.

Related Posts:

  • Life with Mikey (Thanksgiving Special)By Mikey Mikey has been put on an indefinite suspension due to issues involving the use of popular brand names that I'm not at liberty to go into very much detail on. He still had some Mikeyisms to burn off and requeste… Read More
  • Life with Mikey (11-01-10)By Mikey Halloween was last night and I forgot to turn the light on during the Trick or Treat hours so I still have so much candy left. Oops. I guess we'll just have to eat it.I would eat coconut more often if they wer… Read More
  • Life with DaveyBy Davey Duke One Year in Texas contacted me to save its fledgling Life with Mikey article that is written by a simpleton that nobody can relate too. I guess they asked me, I am fairly relatable. Much like you, I hate … Read More
  • Life with Mikey #90By Mikey I'm so close to hitting #100 that I can taste it, and it tastes almost as delicious as an Arby-Q. Leave a comment about what you like to eat.I don't want to be buried of cremated. They both seem scary.My wife … Read More
  • Life with Mikey #89By Mikey Hi everybody. This is my 89th issue of Life with Mikey. I begged Jake and Glenn to let me go to 100. This is a milestone I do not want to miss, unlike being the fattest kid in the third grade.Hungry Hungry Hi… Read More

6 comments:

  1. No one is asking you to pay for abortions you FUCKING IDIOT.

    ReplyDelete
  2. applejacks are so good wtf! YOU'RE worse than nothing!

    ReplyDelete
  3. What would you know about the character and integrity of arsonists, jerk?! You're too busy playing Boggle and eating ARBY'S to notice your fucking house is on fire!!!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Mikey, this was a really hilarious Life with Mikey. Keep up the good work you boob!

    ReplyDelete
  5. i'm with brandon - leave the arsonists alone!!! and what's this you've got against speghetti squash? you're really taking a dive here, mikey. a real, sharp nose dive.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Pirates are going to make a stunning comeback when "Pirates of the Caribbean IV: Farewell To Orlando Bloom's Poor Acting Ability" makes its debut.

    ReplyDelete

no more comments from spam bots. fuck off.

Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.