My car is really dirty right now. My wife keeps asking me to take it to a car wash, but why pay $5 when it's just going to snow again and I'll be right back at the start. My wife says I'm being lazy, but I'm really just being thrifty.
Why would anybody need a Rubik's cube when there's a jigsaw puzzle to put together?
Everybody used to think Bigfoot was the best, but Gravedigger changed their minds. I'm embarrassed to admit that.
When it comes to women's volleyball I always root for the USA.
Honeydew and cantaloupe are delicious. I could take or leave pineapple.
If someone forgets to send me a holiday card, I'll get over it. But they probably won't get one from me next year.
I have to finish this two liter of Diet Sunkist tonight. I don't want to, but it'll be flat by the time I get around to it tomorrow.
It's Pat had a few laughs.
Peanuts are a good snack and an amazing comic strip.
I wonder if Charles Schultz is related to Schultz from Hogan's Heroes.
If Cheetos are great then why are Doritos so popular?
Fishing doesn't have to be a seasonal sport, but that's not what my wife will tell you.
I'd rather have grape juice than wine.
Why isn't there a movie based on Sanford and Son?
i won't go so far as to say that this is the best LWM ever, but it's my favorite in awhile. i loled at every single one.
ReplyDeleteI'm thrifty, Mikey, but I know when to wash the salt off my car before it corrodes! And I would never go into a diabetic coma just to save 2 liters of diet sunkist!
ReplyDeleteNate, how the hell are you going to go into a diabetic coma drinking a sugarless soda!?
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