Hey Man! Fuck like a Beast! The Interview

By Brad

Every now and then, most people of common intelligence ask themselves: "I wonder what it's like to fuck like a beast?" I too have asked myself this question millions of times, but have never found the answer. So I decided to ask my buddy Jim Bob Duggar, a professional fuckologist, this same question.

Brad: "So Jim Bob, let me get right down to the point, What's it like to fuck like a beast?"

Jim Bob: "It's Great! It's like hanging out with our Jesus"

Brad: "Our Jesus is a great God, isn't he Jim Bob!"

Jim Bob: "He is the greatest God! Much better than all of those other ones!"

Brad: "So a recent interview with the good folks over at The Today show revealed to me that you are expecting another baby, that makes 19 God Warriors in total!"

Jim Bob: "You've heard correctly Brad!"

Brad: "Fuck like a beast!" (Multiple high fives occur)

Jim Bob: "Want to know something Brad? It's fuckin' tough to be a beast fucker. Shittin' out 1 to 2 kids every 9 months is not something we all want to do or are capable of, but somehow my wife just keeps the train rolling."

Brad: "Dude, your wife's vagina must be just a huge gaping hole. How do you even get off on that shit?"

Jim Bob: "All you gotta do is just fuck like a beast, dummy! Gotta Jet Bro!"

Brad: "Alright Jim Bob, We will see you down at the Mega Church on Sunday to lay praise on our Jesus."

This interview was quite possibly the most eye opening interview that I have done in the past nine years of my journalistic endevours. It completely answered the age old question, "What's it like to Fuck Like A Beast"? Thanks goes to Jim Bob Duggar for his time and experience.