Life With Mikey [8-31-09]

By Mikey

McDonald's breakfast is like drugs to me. Every morning I need to get their amazing hotcakes and a sausage McMuffin. Instead of an orange juice I like to get Power Ade so I can stay energized for the rest of the day.


Why are people so attracted to stewardesses? They're basically just waitresses on an airplane.

Nobody appreciates Bob Hope these days.

I'm on a diet, which means I don't eat the bun when I go to Arby's for lunch.

I'm not going to get on a treadmill. If I'm running there better be a bull chasing me.

What a cold summer this year. I guess it's better than having a bunch of old people dying from the heat.

Granola is disgusting.

How do they puff rice? They should make a tv show about that.

Contra is such a hard game. Ms. Pac-Man is more of my thing, even if it is sexualized.

Scientology seems a little far fetched, but don't tell Will Smith I said that.

Hustler should try their hand at making a mainstream movie instead of just putting out smut.

My kid loves dinosaurs, but I don't see what's so great about them. They're all dead, how great can they be?

Grilled cheese is a bad lunch. Throw a piece of ham on there and we'll talk.

Teen Wolf isn't a very scary horror movie.

Celery is good, but what's the deal with the stringy stuff.

Onion rings are better than french fries, but you can't beat cheese sticks.