Life With Mikey [6-15-09]

By Mikey

What a week. First, the kid (he's out of school now) breaks his arm skateboarding. This kid thinks he's Tony Hawk and he falls down in our driveway. Then the wife gets a speeding ticket. Like she needs to drive 55 miles per hour in a 35 to go buy a ham. Give me a break! Then I go to Arby's and order a roastbeef sandwich and guess what? I forgot my money! At least this week couldn't be any worse.


Why can't they make garden hoses more manageable?

Popeyes' chicken certainly is not the best.

The smell of wet dog always makes me gag.

"Duke of Earl" is not as good of a song as I remembered.

I would love to smoke a Cuban cigar, even if I don't agree with their politics.

I wouldn't ever take steroids no matter how badly I want to hit a home run.

Remember that movie Encino Man? Pauly Shore was a star that shined too bright.

If I get really angry or frustrated I just go outside and sidekick the heck out of the oak tree in the backyard.

If I could fix my own car I'd still have money in my bank account.

You don't see people wearing watches a lot these days.

I misplaced my pair of Oakleys.

My new thing is biscuits in gravy in the morning. Way better than coffee.

I have never had a successful arm wrestling match.

My guitar really needs a restringing, but I just don't feel like doing it. I'll just listen to Seven Mary Three instead of playing one of their hits.

There used to be so many detective shows on TV back in the day, now there's only cop shows about rape. What a world!