Life with Mikey [4-13-09]

By Mikey

Howdy folks. I just got back from my annual vacation to a dude ranch in Texas. It was a good time. I learned how to drive cattle like in the movie City Slickers. My wife got annoyed with me because I called every cow "Norman."

• Try as I might, I can't figure out what's going on this season of Lost. Personally I prefer shows you can miss a few episodes and still enjoy, like Everybody Loves Raymond.
  
  
• Am I the only one who longs for the days of lemonade stands? Country Time Lemonade is a real thirst-quencher, but when I was a kid we'd pick some lemons off a tree and go into business. Business usually lasted until we drank all the product.
  
  
• It seems like nobody is talking about the Houston Rockets anymore.
  
  
• Mr. Magoo is blind-- I get it, okay!
  
  
• The XFL died a premature death, in my humble opinion.
  
  
• If you serve me mashed potatoes and don't give me gravy, prepare for me to scream.
  
  
• When I heard Arby's added the Roastburger to their menu, I had to check the calender to make sure it wasn't my birthday. It wasn't.
  
  
• Mountain Dew's Code Red is like mother's milk to me.
  
  
• People usually forget how funny Michael Winslow's stand-up comedy is. They usually just remember him from his fantastic performances in the Police Academy films.
  
  
• When my son tells me "the last time I heard that I fell off my dinosaur" I feel like I'm going to turn into the Incredible Hulk and hurl his stupid scooter into the sun.
  
  
• It was amazing how fast parachute pants went out of style.
  
  
• You'll never catch me jumping on the Twilight bandwagon.
  
  
• Would anybody else go see a movie about the Noid? I don't mean to be living in the 80s, but that guy was really cool even if he did hate pizzas.
  
  
• Seems like everybody who sends me an email wants to send me money these days.
  
  
• I'm not a big fan of Tupac's rapping, but his performance in Poetic Justice is very moving.