One Week Entertainment [2-28-09]

By Kaleena

If it's one things I'm really rather good at, it's celebrity news and gossip. It also happens to be one of the most feminine things about me. I am frequently drawn by a curious magnetism to those "rubbish" magazines that line the pathway to the grocery-store checkouts. Drives Jake crazy, but I stand by that I can't help it!

I suppose, then, that it was an inevitable for me to volunteer and take over the 'One Week in Entertainment' article. I hope you are amused, entertained and informed.

Without further adieu, read this damn article. Thank you.

Jennifer Love Hewitt celebrates turning 30 by dressing up like Audrey Hepburn, having breakfast at Tiffany's and ending the night with a party with the cast of The Ghost Whisperer where the ladies came as Audrey from Breakfast at Tiffany's and the guys as 'George Peppard'. My god she's annoying.

In more vain Oscar news....

Beyonce wore the craziest dress I've seen to the Oscars. Yet I still have all the respect in the world for her.

Nicole Kidman is still Australian.

I can't believe Kate Winslet won over Angelina Jolie. What's wrong with this world?

Heath Ledger won the Oscar for Best Supporting Actor. Matilda, his 3-year-old daughter will inherit the Oscar when she turns 18. I think this is really sweet.

Onto other news....

Micheal Cera has signed on to do the 'Arrested Development' movie. Good choice son-you're adorable, awkward and probably due to play a modern day heroin addict at some point.

Andy Richter will join Conan on 'The Tonight Show' as his announcer or side-kick (sources are mixed on the decision). This brought tears of joy to my eyes and heart.

Nicole Richie and Joel Madden are expecting - again! Congrats and whatever.

J-Lo and Marc Anthony (who are reportedly separated) had the most sensible birthday party for their year old twins I've heard of in Hollywood. They only had two moonbouncers and one clown. Really, thank you for not bringing the whole damn circus. They're one for Christ's sakes.

Megan Fox and Brian Austin Green have called off their engagement. She is so young and so hot - this is probably for the better. No offense Mr. Green. You're aging very gracefully.

Nadya Suleman and her mother Angela faced off on Radar.com in a debate on Nadya's decision to have the frozen embryos planted in her. Her mother sounds like a sane woman, go figure. My questions is when will the taxpayers get to say "We are not paying for that woman's decision anymore"?

Model/actress Minka Kelly talks to Health magazine about her "bubble-butt" and love of eating. In about two years, she'll be talking about her battle with anorexia followed by bulimia.For all you sensitive types, I am only joking and never wish this on anyone.

Tiger Woods referred to his recent knee injury as a "blessing" because it gave him more time to spend at home with the family. What a guy!!

Lisa Rina would rather go naked than host events. My first thought was - who?

Russell Simmons is said to be paying $40,000 in child support. If you're going to have a baby, make sure it's by a celebrity.

Sam Jackson has signed on to play Nick Fury in possibly 9 future Marvel movies. I very much <3 Sam Jackson.

I do hope you all enjoyed my first Entertainment column. Thanks for reading and I'll see you next week!